that we've been awaiting for such a long time. last night i may have freaked out a little bit. i'm just sayin'...it's hard to wrap my mind around this tight rope walk of faith and fear. but i find that i'm learning the same thing as before. it's all a choice. and i think last night i needed to be scared so that i could be okay today.
to be honest, i'm pretty sure the anesthesiologist thinks i'm a heartless, emotionless shell of a woman :) when they took weston away, i just gave him a kiss and told him goodbye. i didn't have any tears left. and i wasn't scared. i knew that what's happening is to help little man and it's necessary for him to get better. even as the surgeon took us into that tiny room to explain the procedure and disclose the risks, i just nodded and smiled. i didn't have any questions. i've gone over and over in my head 10,000 times what is wrong with his heart, what they'll do to fix it, and all the unimaginable possibilities of what could happen.
so i'm not scared. i don't know what will happen. but this peace that overtakes me whenever i walk into this hospital is the most real thing i've felt in a long time.
Many prayers being said for you guys today. Love you all . . .
ReplyDeletei know we don't know each other personally, but from one mother who's had a very sick child to another, i'm praying for you and your family and the doctors today.
ReplyDeletei will remember your expression of the 'tight rope walk of faith and fear.' it seems like we all walk that line through all sorts of experiences in life. what a great metaphor. thanks for sharing.
We're praying for you!
ReplyDeleteIt's here! It's today! It's happening! The Anderson family is praying for Weston, the people who will perform surgery and provide care, and your family. You can put our faith in the big pile of people's faith for Weston.
ReplyDeleteI love you!
See? You're a NieNie.
ReplyDelete(huggs) big, giant, warm, (hugs). you are so very brave miss callie. so very, very, very brave. your faith strengthens my own.
ReplyDeleteOh Callie I don't know what it is about your blog but you always make me cry or at least my eyes water. I love your way with words and your faith. You are so wonderful. I love the faith I just love it. I am so glad you feel comfortable and know who is in control. I guess it is so good to go through situations like this because there is no denying your feelings and it leaves a permanent mark on you. You will never forget them. We send all of our love your way.
ReplyDeletethinking and praying for you. he is such a sweet lil' guy. keep us posted.
ReplyDeleteCallie, you are amazing, and I love you.
ReplyDeleteAsher and Josh prayed for you guys Yesterday morning! We're thinking of you guys!
ReplyDeleteyou are incredible. i could feel your peace as i read this.
ReplyDeleteprayer for you and baby weston.
oh, and that picture of him in his high chair? incredible.
ReplyDeleteI will just second Camille and say, ditto to her. We love you guys and our prayers are continuous!
ReplyDeletewe love your little guy. Prayers have been going your way.
ReplyDeleteSorry I missed this post before...but we were praying and are praying and so happy everything went so well. We think of this little boy often even though we don't get to see him often...we love him and you.
ReplyDeleteThat baby is beautiful. Mmmmmm...really beautiful. Hope he is continuously getting bigger and stronger.
ReplyDelete