focus on the positive...

jon just left for san francisco to shoot his wedding. the kids are all down and it's 7:00. i asked jon to give me a blessing before he left so i wouldn't be freaking out the whole time about the baby coming while he's gone. i thought, "oh, i'm being faithful...asking for a blessing...i'll hear just what i need to hear"...not so much. i've come to realize in the past couple of weeks that what i want isn't always what's best for me or those around me. i think i'd come to the point i thought i knew what was best in every situation and i'm learning that i was definitely wrong. i've been trying to get this baby here by ANY & ALL means possible to avoid exactly what i'm feeling right now...scared. in the blessing i was hoping to hear something along the lines of "your whom will keep nurturing the child in your body and all will be well until your husband gets home on sunday at 11am. you won't feel discomfort, you won't be stressed out...etc, etc." but it was more along the lines of "i bless you with comfort and with confidence to face the times ahead of you. focus on the positive and you will be blessed with the spirit surrounding you to do the things you need and want to do as a mother." a little different than what i was hoping for. poor jon had to leave right after the blessing with me bawling like a baby because i was still scared. but as i write this i'm realizing that faith and trust in God are not something you just have once or twice and then you're done. He continues to give us opportunities to increase our faith and exercise our trust. otherwise, i think it would just fizzle...

so in order to "focus on the positive", i'll share with you the absolute highlight of the last couple of days...

i love all of my children, but today ila outdid herself and made my day. as many of you know isaac is not the most adventurous of eaters. to be honest i can probably count on one hand the number of things he will eat without a fight. the girls have always been better and ila has always been the best as far as trying and actually swallowing new foods.

today, however, we met millie, micah, sue, and some merced people for lunch. ila LOVES to dip things in some sort of sauce and then eat them. well today we had calamari for an appetizer and i thought, "hey! why not?" and gave her some. SHE SCARFED IT!!! i was the proudest and happiest i'd been as a mother since isaac went #2 in the potty for the first time. she proceeded to eat almost 1/3 of the whole appetizer just as happy as could be.

then when we were eating dinner tonight (nuggets, pizza, & mac n cheese for the kiddos and a salad i made from the salad bar at wild oats for me) she kept asking me for a bite. so once i again i thought, "hey! why not?" and ila proceeded to happily consume edamame, pumpkin seeds, spring salad mix, red peppers, carrots, and kalamata olives. i ran upstairs to tell jon and his reaction was, "she is definitely your kid" (jon hates all of that stuff).

so ila, when you are reading this 15 - 20 years from now, thank you for giving me something to be able to focus on the positive. and lulu, whenever you do decide to come whether it's tonight or monday morning, we're glad you came to our family. :)