i think buying contraception is a bit awkward in and of itself, especially when it is your sole purchase for the evening. but then it gets a little more uncomfortable when you can't find them and have to ask where they are...then just imagine once you have mustered up the courage to ask someone (and then finally found a woman to ask) she tells you, "oh, they're over by the pharmacy. i'll have to unlock them for you."
i almost cut my losses and ran. but i'm mature, right?
then it dawned on me...once she'd unlocked the cabinet she would have to wait there and observe me making my choice before she could put the goods back under lock and key. so i took a big breath and turned to that aforementioned maturity that had kept me from running in the first place, and i made my selection.
on the way to the register i realized the experience had all been a little much, so i decided to remedy the situation with an additional purchase...
i almost cut my losses and ran. but i'm mature, right?
then it dawned on me...once she'd unlocked the cabinet she would have to wait there and observe me making my choice before she could put the goods back under lock and key. so i took a big breath and turned to that aforementioned maturity that had kept me from running in the first place, and i made my selection.
on the way to the register i realized the experience had all been a little much, so i decided to remedy the situation with an additional purchase...
(haagen dazs vanilla swiss almond)
but when i got home i discovered i'd bought this instead...
(haagen dazs chocolate peanut butter)
i think the trauma of the experience has me converted*
to the healing power of peanut butter and chocolate.
*author's note: prior to this experience the author did not consume peanut butter unless in pb&j form. and always with a cold glass of milk. no chocolate.
Mmm the mistake has me wanting to run to the grocery store.
ReplyDeleteI am perplexed as to why one must ask to have the cabinet unlocked to get such needed contraception...I mean, I understand if they are having a theft problem, but what about the rest of us normal people?! You poor thing.
hahahaha, this has totally happened to me before too, except they COULDN'T get it out of the pharmacy. so i had to try again at ANOTHER store.
ReplyDeleteand pb and chocolate...my personal heaven. most of the time my desert is some form of them together.
Oh, I discovered the healing powers of chocolate and peanut butter a LONG time ago, and it's become quite an addiction, I can no longer eat choc ice cream alone. As for the contraception, I have to wonder what you were purchasing, lol! I CAN say that a Mirena IUD is one of the best things that happened in my life!
ReplyDeletetoo funny and true! I ate a whole pint of haagen dazs chocolate peanut butter last week. It felt great.
ReplyDelete~Sarah
Sometimes I feel bad for the teenagers working at the counter where they are kept. I think they get more embarrassed than I do sometimes.
ReplyDeleteJust the other day I was headed for a shelf and a guy walked up at the same time and my immature side faked that I was headed somewhere else. I had to pass back and forth checking to see if he was finished. I should have been able to handle it but the thought if the two os us cramming into the tiny section together in an otherwise empty isle was too much. I should have gotten some ice cream to remedy.
holy cow! those ice creams look to die for. i feel a pregnancy craving coming on...
ReplyDeletei totally agree about the contraception purchasing. it is totally awkward. i always analyze the checkers before choosing a lane.
I. LOVED. THIS. POST.
ReplyDeleteLoved it!!
Um, yeah, that's a fun shopping trip. I go to Xalmart where they keep the contraceptives on a shelf facing all the people standing in line to use the pharmacy. Men, women, kids. It's fun. I always call my husband when I stand there and too-loudly ask "hon, what kind would you like? There's glow-in-the dark, ribbed, lamb..."
Years ago, I bought a pack of 144 contraceptives off eBay. Best purchasing format/price ever. I was so excited but Dave wouldn't let me tell anyone about it.
Oops.
Hee hee hee. I've done the same thing that Adhis has done where you ask them what they like and then just chuckle at peoples reaction. I do have to say though, that the peanut butter & chocolate ice cream is my absolute most favorite thing ever. I always get that now when I have a choice. Checking out the ice cream isle at the store, Bill doesn't even need to ask me anymore. LOL He knows!
ReplyDelete