here goes nothing

Saturday November 5, 2005

you know that feeling you get when things have been going so great for such a long time, and you're kind of just waiting for something to go wrong? welp, i was there. and i was even in denial that i was there, but there i was. and today happened. it actually all started last night when we went to go see "New York Doll" (what a great film by the way). it was our second date night in a row and the movie was wonderful and we were even feeling okay about being old and suburban and the parents of three kids as we kept running into people from the past. i'm rambling....it all started last night with the movie and realizing, as i'm watching the lead singer from new york dolls sing "a poor wayfaring man of grief", that god's love is pure and He is no respector of persons...and that sadly enough mine was not and i have been.

then i wake up, kind of, get in the car and start to leave to pick up ruby and CRASH! SCRAPE! ERRRRK! i back the scienna in to the scion. how poetic. jon is fine until the reality of two deductibles sets in and he's not a happy camper. and of course i'm hurt because he's frustrated...which he has every right to be...and i leave in a huff. i get home 30 minutes later, he apologizes and all is honky dorry.

fast forward 2 hours later. jon's home from his shoot...i'm getting dressed for the day and jon thinks i have isaac and i think jon has isaac. and neither one of us has isaac. but jon's camera bag has isaac inthralled. and isaac is so interested in his dad's work that he can't contain himself and takes it out on the 6 rolls of exposed film from the wedding yesterday and unravels them all.

jon doesn't cry. jon gets mad. but miracles never cease and jon broke into heaving tears. i sat on the stairs crying as well not knowing what to do. jon recovered so well and so quickly i think he set a world record. and after a good nap and a good meal he says, "i think hard things happen to make us realize what's important." amen to that.

so what i've learned today is to be prepared for the worst and expect the best. we don't have control of a lot of the hard things that come our way. we have control over how we choose to deal with them. snatch joy in little pieces. revel in the happy times of life and let the hard stuff go like water off a duck's waxy, feathery back.