she did it...

so, i climbed the mountain...or i guess i should say we climbed the mountain. but i think most importantly, SHE climbed that mountain. i can't say that i've ever had a more metaphoric experience in my life. when i read stephanie's post inviting readers to join her, i knew i had to go...i even had another name pop into my head and knew that person needed to go and that we'd do it together.

i've had a hard time deciding how i feel about the experience. i was super excited about doing it and super grateful for the last minute baby watching my mom and mother-in-law offered up. four other ladies from the neighborhood joined in at the last minute and that made it even more fun. we got there just in time to get a good parking spot and then waited a few minutes until stephanie's dad welcomed everyone there.

then stephanie stood at the head of the trail to greet all the hikers on our way up. she was brave and she was glowing. the emotion of it all overwhelmed me and when i reached her i had no words. what could i say in that short amount of time that would make her understand the change she sparked in me and in so many other people?

you could see her little body was fragile but when i saw her eyes...i can't get the image of her eyes out of my head. the strength, the light, the courage, and something i can't put into words.

even writing this now, i wonder about the propriety of it all. i felt that way when i was there too; as if i was intruding on this very special and very personal event. but then the balloons were let go. and i realized it was a celebration...and a triumph.


the anniversary of their crash is the anniversary of the best decision of my life (7 years today). i don't know that our anniversary will pass without remembering her. and as we walked down the mountain and watched the sun disappear, i felt a strange sense of closure. it hit me how different i am from the scared and insecure girl who arrived in that little town more than a decade ago. it made me grateful for life lessons and the infinite chances our maker gives us to become the person he sees we can become. god bless nie and god bless her little family. there's a special place in heaven for all of them :)